How To Stop Subconsciously Sabotaging Your Love Life – Part 2
In Part 1 of this post, I explained that if dating feels like a challenge to you or you’re struggling in your relationship, you may have some subconscious beliefs and fears that are keeping you from getting the love you want.
In this post, I want to give you some steps to start turning this around.
First, it’s important to understand that focusing all your energy and attention on what you DON’T want creates a “feedback loop” in your subconscious mind.
When you focus on something, you’re feeding it back to yourself and you end up drawing it TOWARDS you, since we’re always subconsciously looking for evidence to confirm our beliefs.
If you’re focusing on something negative from your past because you’re terrified it’s going to happen again, you’ll often end up attracting and creating that.
If you’re constantly saying things like, “I don’t want another bad relationship” – by focusing on the negative, you may end up attracting the very thing you’re trying to avoid!
If you’ve ever known a woman who gets into relationships with the same type of men over and over – whether it’s men who are unfaithful, abusive, or have addiction issues – it really demonstrates how this works.
You can consciously think, “I’m not going get involved with a man who’s unfaithful” – but if you’re subconsciously holding onto negative beliefs such as, “All men cheat” – you’re going to gravitate toward those beliefs and find evidence to confirm them.
This is why you want to be conscious of what you’re putting out there – and focus on what you WANT rather than what you DON’T want. What you focus on is what you get.
What you want to do is create some new associations. Start by creating some new beliefs around the idea that dating is something that allows you to explore yourself and practice opening up and expressing who you really are.
We all want to be loved for who we really are, and yet deep down we’re terrified to show up as who we really are. We often want to hide who we are and put our “best foot forward” – but that’s an inefficient system!
Our greatest strength is in being our true selves – that’s what draws the right people to us.
Every moment is an opportunity to create new habits and build new pathways in your brain! When you know who you are and begin to choose what you’re exuding, you’ll start to get different results.