How To Overcome Feelings Of Insecurity In Your Love Life
If you’ve ever felt afraid of losing a man’s love – or even changed yourself in order to “earn” or keep his love – you may be chasing love or seeking security outside of yourself.
Deep down you may be thinking, “If I can win (or keep) this man’s love, I’ll finally feel lovable and secure, and everything in my life will be complete.”
When you put the key to your happiness or sense of security in someone else’s hands – if they don’t do what you want, you can take that to mean that you’re not worthwhile or lovable!
If you don’t learn to get that love and security from inside yourself first, it will keep you chasing love on the outside that you think is going to heal you – but it never does.
The truth is, falling in love with yourself first is the only way to actually believe that someone else will really love you – and therefore the only way to TRULY feel secure in a relationship.
If you don’t fall in love with yourself first, when someone tells you they love you, you won’t believe them anyway!
In order to stop chasing love and security outside of yourself, you first need to realize that those things don’t come from somewhere “out there” – they come from INSIDE yourself first – and then you’ll naturally attract a man who makes you feel loved and secure.
Before I figured that out, I had men who wanted to love me but I never felt completely secure – it was never “enough.” It never did what I thought it was going to do – there was always something “off” because I was feeling off inside myself!
To discover this love and security inside yourself, you first need to decide that YOU are worthy of your own time and energy. You’re worthy of becoming curious about who you are, caring about your own desires, and becoming engaged in your own life.
Then you need to decide that you’re worth including in a loving relationship – instead of constantly trying to do what you think is going to appeal to someone else.
Once you learn to get that love and security from INSIDE yourself first, you’ll start attracting men who want to love you and make you feel secure – just because you’re YOU!
If you’re constantly feeling afraid that you’re going to lose a man’s love – or that you won’t ever get his love in the first place – this only decreases your feelings of security and self-worth.
When you start eroding away your self-esteem this way, it will cost you more than love – it will cost you in ALL areas in your life.
The more you’re willing to honor yourself and be proud of who you are, the more REAL love you can receive and the more you can believe it.
Next time you to start to feel insecure about anything in your life, here are a couple Peace Of Mind Mantras from The Feminine Art Of Attraction Program that you can say to yourself:
♥ Everything is working out perfectly.
♥ Things are unfolding exactly the way they’re supposed to.
♥ This is exactly where I’m supposed to be.
♥ I’m getting stronger and healthier every day.
♥ These are the right people, this is the right time, and I’m in the right place to attract everything I desire.
♥ My needs will always be met, now and forever.
Let me know how these work for you!
If you’re ready to attract the love you desire AND start living the life of your dreams, click here to check out The Feminine Art Of Attraction.
14 replies to "How To Overcome Feelings Of Insecurity In Your Love Life"
This made logical sense, probably because it happened to me. Then comes along a good man.
thank you! I loved what I read and I am going to start asking myself and telling myself these thngs.
These words made me want to cry, I couldn’t understand the problem until now! I do need to learn to love myself! It’s going to be hard for me since I’ve not had much self esteem! Wish me luck?
Thanks alot this means alot to me
My case is so different .
These things help yes, but I trying to lesrm whst being in love what yourself means. I wasn’t expecting on thr option to buy a book ( about attracting a man)
I strongly believe that I’m healed since I’ve read this
Thank you for the information
I still believe in love and I was already lovely
Plz give me important suggestion… My love life is so good…but i feel so worry nd frustrated about our future.. Cause his family cant accept me..they wont want me as his wife,but he loves me a lot..he doesnt want to marry another lady.. He wants to flee away nd then marry me..he is a nice guy nd loves me a lot.nd he understandme well..what should i do now..plz tell me… I also love him..how can i fall him to my love that’swhy he wont leave me at all after our marriag. Plz i need suggestions. plzz..i m so depressed nd sick..
Great article! I truly believe that what you’re saying is true – the key to feeling loved and secure in a relationship lies in feeling loved and secure within yourself FIRST. Because men will treat you the way you treat yourself.
I just have one qualm/ issue with the “Peace of Mind” mantras. Those kinds of positive affirmations during a time when I’m feeling sad and insecure are only likely to make matters WORSE because I wouldn’t belive them…! ( deep down emotionally) They’re more likely to make me want to throw my arms up in anger and frustration and scream at the top of my lungs: “Everything is NOT working out perfectly!!!” “And this is NOT exactly where I’m supposed to be!!! I have them accomplished x,y,z in my life! How can you say I’m where I’m supposed to be?!!” etc.
I know the feeling yet if you start by acknowledging it takes TIME to make changes, one can say « up until now I let someone else make me happy from now on I will make myself happy «
Make a list of things you enjoy by yourself: listening to your favorite music ?, making music ? yourself, singing ?, dancing ??
Going for walks (alone) near the ocean ?, in the mountains, enjoy nature and BREATH, fill your lungs with good health, write a poem, or a letter to yourself, a friend, the world,
Go to a meetup group is free, watch a documentary about nature, the universe, animals , plants, traveling, history etc, go help a homeless person give him/her a blanket or something to eat, help a child that needs help, tutor someone to learn to read and write, etc
And truly believe me eventually it will happen. One starts finding one self and being happy. Give time and positive actions to time.
My husband passed away 5 yrs ago my self-esteem is very low l do not love myself how can a man love me i have looked for love again? Married over 50 yrs to one man how can i put myself out there and not get hurt i am 74 married right of high school i am about to give up
Great piece here. Thanks.